Saturday, January 30, 2010

Rolling Thoughts


I cannot explain the feelings I find
Wandering aimlessly
Inside my lonely sky
I brood
I contemplate
Rolling thoughts
Over my tongue
How I feel
I do not know
I search and seek
To find the source
Of my darkened mood
My muse
Though quiet
Tugs at my emotions
Churning
Spinning
Tales I can tell
Haunting me
My dreams
Splintering my waking
Need
Despair lingers
I cannot explain the feelings I find
Wandering aimlessly
Inside my lonely mind

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Different Me

I cannot define
The love I see
It's tangible
And real
Your heart speaks
To mine
Loud and clear
When I Look I
See myself
In your eyes
And I become a
Different me
So bright and alive
I Feel
Every
Word every expression
You provide
Before me with
Your soul
You're holding me
Forever
Keeping
A place
Marked just for
Me
There is no doubt
Truly I know
You love me

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Just Decide

Emotions overwhelming
Twisting and knotting
I’m drowning
I can’t breathe
My words thrown
Back at me
Swallowing my need
To know
To understand
Explain it please
Enlighten me
Punish me
Save me from my sin
I’m sinking
Don’t you see
You own me
With Power
From your fingertips
You determine
What will be
Fight with me
Stay with me
Or leave me to die
Just decide

Monday, January 25, 2010

Reaching

Body bare
before you
my eyes open
and old
misery
hides within my
heart
heavy
feelings linger
telling tales
full of
lies and lust
reaching
begging
who stands
before me
I no longer
know those
eyes I see
full of despair
behind weepy
walls of
contradiction
you hide
your heart from
mine
Let me in

Saturday, January 23, 2010

My Sacrifice

I hesitated
Unsure and unknowing
Finally revealed
I came to you

A connection so great
My soul found true
Ready to bare all
I was too late

You had chosen another
I unraveled before you
Watching in silence
I never told you

Just whispers in my head
I love you
I can't tell you
I will not reveal

My sacrifice clear
A friendship only
Quiet in my heart
I'll keep you

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Whisper

Rescue me
take me away
with you
hiding together
Just the two of us in
my dream
candles lighting our
love wrapped
up in cradled
intensity
my fingers trace
promises of love
in your skin
kisses follow behind
a breath
a whisper
a fantasy
you're holding me
loving me
making me yours
in my dream
for you to claim me
brand me
with honeyed ecstasy
in our hiding
place is where
we can be

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Why?

Loss.
Such a small word
harbors such devastation.
No explanation,
a lack of understanding,
things change too quickly.
In the blink of an eye
people are gone.
They turn away and
I'm left
with only this word.
This word
which means so many things,
I'm unable to explain.
Without choice
I am left with only
one thought,
one question:
"Why?"

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

I'd Fall

I'm terrified
to be near you
hold me
closer don't let
me go
the walls are strong
around me
protecting me from
fools but
not from you
climb higher
don't go
I'm broken and
too warm in your
arms to care what
others will think when
I'm with you
the feelings
grow so strong
taking hold
of my heart and
my soul
I'd be lost if
you ever let go
I'd fall

Wishing You

The pain in my chest
is too great
pushing and pulling
my emotions
create such
agony
My heart burns for
you to come
back to me
The knot in my throat
a bitter pill
to swallow while
I stare at your picture
and wish
always wanting
you here
by my side where
you belong

Rain

The rain streaks
down my face
leaving scars
like tattered kisses
that once
burned
the sky as black
as my heart became
when you walked
away leaving me
alone
in the rain
holding nothing
but the sin
from your bleeding
sweet skin
The rain streaks
down my face
kissing my cheeks
reminding me
of you

Monday, January 18, 2010

Never Be

Pictures of happiness

Trickling through life

With eyes for only one another

Never to stray

Always stay

Forever this vow I’ll not break


Temptation invited in

All things on the line

Never my intention this affair

Neither of us free

Hearts will bleed

Breaking my bond with my offering


Reciprocation in turn

Willingly we cultivate

Consequences with no care

Stolen love we share

Words and promises

Touching and pleasing in secret we keep


This can never be

Only our fantasies

Your body buried within me

Holding me

Loving me

Dreams of pure ecstasy and release


I refuse to let you go

In my heart you’re true

Souls too deeply intertwined

Agonizing love

Tragic bliss

Pure perfection can never be reached


No choice to make

My vow I’ll not break

Home is where I must stay

Continuing to love you

Stay with me

I’ll choose both if I’m to have my way

Sunday, January 17, 2010

My Need

The need to express
the feelings I feel
Overwhelms me
You're all I can see
You've become a constant
Beacon of light in shattered
darkness wrapped around me
Will you always be so
Wonderful to me
My everything
Tasting me with sweet
Kisses
Caressing my every need
Providing me with
Such ecstasy
My undeniable need
To feel you next
To me
Overwhelms me
Your lips and
Skin bittersweet
To me
You are amazing
I love you
My sweet destiny

Friday, January 15, 2010

The Dance

Two souls drifting, lost and seeking

Wandering aimlessly and unnoticed

One single moment in time the accidental finding occurs

Wrapped in moonlight they perform their dance of words

Behind a painted screen, pining in secrecy

Hidden from site love blooms beyond all expectation

A feral need, coated in bittersweet sensuality

Never to be fulfilled

Their love becoming a never ending abyss

Two souls still drifting, no longer seeking

Together inside the song

Separated only by reality

Stealing moments in time to hide within

The dancer and her muse

Thursday, January 14, 2010

My Apology

I'm sorry

I didn't mean it
Insecurity bubbled over
Expectation bled through

I battled, I tried
I lost the war in my mind
The words burst forth

Passive aggressive music
Too loud in my head
My retaliation burns

Sickened as the words pass my lips
Undertones of pain
Hidden within the venom

You don't understand
Lost in my translation
Listen while I explain

I'm hurt...I still want you

I'm disappointed...I still need you

I'm confused...I still seek you

I hurt you...I love you

I'm sorry

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Burning

I'm your secret desire
Your unparalleled need

Do you want me as much as I want you?
Do you feel me touching you?

The heat of you overwhelms
Writhing as I burn for you

Twist and turn deep inside me
Possessing everything

I'll be yours always
Claim what you seek

I know it is me
Let me whisper in your fantasies

Holding you in the dark
Filling your heart with me

Burning bright
Love follows ecstasy

Everyone's secret desire
All mine, only for me

I refuse to let you go
Look what you've done

You've become part of me
My every breathe encased in need

My forbidden fruit
My forbidden love

You've become everything to me

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Breathe

I can't speak, my lips fail to form the words
My mind refuses to cooperate

I see you waiting, always patient
Forever my gentleman

When I am ready, I will ask
But promise me please

Stay, wait for me
Don't go

You see, eventually the sun will shine
My words will sing

Hold me, in your arms I'll cry
Then I'll be able to breathe

Sunday, January 3, 2010

State of Mind

Watching
Empty
Craving
Bleeding
Lonely
Lost

I'm alone
Missing you always

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Decision

Waiting
Wondering
Will it be today
Needing to know
Will you draw the line

Darkness
Uncertainty
Drowning in despair
You're words they linger
Begging me to set you free

Wanting
Needing you
Loving you still more
Our hands held in the fire
Insanely denying the very pain

Madness
Bleeding toxicity
Why do you stay with me
Why can't you see what I see
The beauty as you make love to me

Decision
In your heart
I want to always stay
Don't make me walk away
Hold your breath let me take your pain

Broken Me

My selfishness knows no bounds.
Infecting the choices I make.

Running from all responsibility.
Denying the harm evenly spread.

Hopeless and helpless insanity.
Tempting God's of understanding.

A fraud running from reality.
Faster and faster I bleed.

Stolen moments of happiness.
Borrowing what's not mine.

Soiling my earned redemption.
My once saved soul now damned.

My make-up now complete.
A presentable face on display.

Saving my coins of despair.
A price surely to be paid.

The beautiful disaster that's me.
Do you love what you see?