Thursday, June 24, 2010

Haunting Lullaby

Hate you?

I can’t

Though I’ve tried

I miss too much of you

The laughter

The joking

The smile meant just for me

Your memory won’t

Let me sleep

Visions of you assault my dreams

A haunting lullaby

Lingers in my mind

I never meant for things to end

The method in which they did

A time wrapped in madness

I never intended

For you to hate me

Hate who you became

While with me

You’re not gone from me

I know you wish to be

I’m baffled

By the quickness

In which I’m gone from you

No…

I don’t hate you

I can’t

Though I’ve tried

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Sweet Memories

Visions of you

Hovering over me

A glimpse of past sensations

Run through my core

Beckoning me

Coaxing free lust

Concealed in shadows

Holding sweet memories

Gasping for air

Begging for more

Tempting

Teasing

Whispering

Do you miss the taste of me?

Friday, June 18, 2010

Bitter Frost

I’m known as

The Ice Queen

Hard and cold

Ruling upon my throne

My kingdom held secure

Surrounded by frozen walls

Those locked outside

Feel my bitter frost

And cast their stones

Attempting to rupture

Barriers held safe

“She’s bitter without a heart”

They chant

Am I?

Yes… I believe I may be

My warmth felt and shared

With only those worthy of me

My love and care

My loyalty

Steadfast in my honor

Ruthless in my defense

With frozen beauty

Reflected in my sword

I gaze upon unworthy fools

Those who’ve forgotten

Those who push away

Warmth penetrating

Ice and frost

Melting away fears

Loneliness and Apathy

You speak as though you know my soul

Do you?

Allow me to introduce myself

I am YOUR Ice Queen

Hard and cold

Once revered

Once loved

Still upon my throne


Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Pursuit

Venomous lullabies

Ooze from my veins

Open and bleeding

Anger…Resentment…Hatred

Real reactions

Unreal emotions

Pain being verity

Hurt masks itself

In passive aggressive

Vindictiveness

Pursuit of justification

There is no end

What is it

God seeks from me?

Wants for me?

Much more than

What I seek for myself

Self righteous demonstrations

Of self

Selfish…Self-Centered

Yet God still loves me

Right where I stand

Patiently waiting

For my surrender

His will

Not mine

Recognizing that love

Still exists

If I just turn around

It Was Me

Did you think it was you?
Did you wonder why he didn’t want you?
Did you dream of him?
Did you wish?
Did you hope?
Did you pray?

Every minute?
Every day?

It could never be you.
Deep down you already knew.
It was me.
I bet you wish.
You could’ve been me.
Though you’ll never be.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Blackened

Wallowing in me

Huddled in a soothing

Embrace of self…

Selfishness

Self-centered

Self…

I’ve no idea

Who or what

I will be

When I’m gone

Will I find lucidity?

Each direction I turn

Walls close slowly

Devouring the last of my sanity

Everything dead

Blackened

Painted by your hand

Fleeting moments of clarity

In between monotonous

Decomposing memories

I’m quite certain

You’re alone

Rotting and cold

Coloring the walls of the box

Containing your soul

Wallowing in you

Huddled in a soothing

Embrace of the box

Remembering who

I thought you were

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Melancholy

Two hearts

Lost in indifference

Wandering

Seeking solace

Hidden within forbidden fruit

Temptation

Entangled and revealed

Reaching into the fire

Beholding an illusion

Melting into one another

Perforating

Facades in keeping

Sharing secrets

Held behind

Walls of protection

Suffering self imposed

Melancholy

Taking comfort

In their obstinance

Finding a false

Reverie

Smoldering in the flame

Singeing their lips

Suckling a fantasy

Now steeped in ash

Scattered to the winds

Two hearts

Lost in eternity

A Child

Tear my heart

From my chest

It beats no more

Broken in pieces

Floating inside my soul

I trusted

A laughable fool

A child

Believing all I was told

Transparency

In my smile

Given freely

For all to behold

But no more

My spirit gone dark

One last flicker of hope

Held afloat

Snuffed out and gone

Monday, June 7, 2010

Your Reflection (posted for a friend)

I've posted this poem on behalf of a friend. She asked me not to reveal her name. If you are interested and want to know who she is you may email me. 1wookiesgirl(@)gmail(.)com. With her permission of course I'll reveal her identity.

I have to say this woman has become a blessing to me. We are new friends, fast friends. God seems to have put her in my life at just the right time. We've held each other up and having her in my life has meant the world to me.

This poem she wrote spoke clearly to my soul. I had to share it with you and she kindly agreed to let me.

I want to say... Thank You my friend!

Thanks for being a light for me as I've walked through the darkness.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your Reflection


I gave you transparency
But your capability
Only allowed you to see
Your craven self in me

Oh, you know me so well
Convinced beyond a doubt
It’s not me, my plea
You couldn’t believe
My faults were your own
How could they be?
Only a mirror you trust you’d believe
And that mirror was not me.

Cursing blue streaks, black streaks, pale
My countenance betraying everything
Venom deadlier than any strike
You struck me
Culpable me
Abusive me
You tell me out of love

Sunday, June 6, 2010

My Prison

Trapped and cold

My breath forms

Frozen rings of steam

Along the glass wall I’m trapped behind

My lungs burn and ache

My screams

Bounce back at me

Your name echoes inside my ears

Penetrating my emptiness

Pounding my fists

Stomping my feet

A child before you

Retaliating

My tantrum is all you perceive

You’re mistaken

Validation is what I seek

The balm I believe I need

One sign

One message

Anything resembling

Once thought truth and promises

Something I can again believe

Instead my soul dies

Shut away in this cold place

My prison

Erected and sealed

Out of sight

Out of mind

Turning your back

Leaving me to freeze

To beg and plead

To suffer

Slowly suffocating

My luster gone

My passion extinguished

Till there’s nothing left of me

Friday, June 4, 2010

Sunshine

Glowing tranquility

Whispers to me

Sifting through recollections

Past love half complete

Unknown circumstance

Enticing my spirit

I pine to feel your sun

Brightness

Encircling me

I yearn

And I crave the light

It settles me

Harmony contained inside

Last summers dream

Your smile

Your heart

The sunshine to me

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

My Sadness

Suffocating

Inside this

Straitjacket

Containing my mind

Winds blow

An ever present

Scent of you

Caressing my grief

My sadness

Keeping me company

Overwhelmed with need

For your familiarity

Alone in this place

With only my mind

Smothered by

An ever present

Memory of you