There you were...You had come back to me.
You filled my night with attention and affection.
You fawned over me.
It was wondrous, glorious and everything I've been missing.
The ache in my chest that had become a constant companion was gone.
I was soaring so high.
I love it when you talk to me.
When you pay attention to me it seems that I am everything.
Everything else slips away and there is only me.
We talked and laughed all night. You told me all the things that you have been doing, everything that I've been missing.
You smiled at me.
You listened with excitement to all my stories. Eager to here everything I had to say.
With one quick word from you all my pain and loneliness had vanished.
Can we begin again?
I sighed with the relief of knowing that it would all be okay; That you might love and want me again.
I could breathe; I was happy.
I awoke in the morning. The ache and the loneliness was there again...
My head was screaming
No. No. NO!
It was a dream. Only a dream.
I curled into a ball.
Wrapping myself in my blankets, holding my pillows for dear life.
My heart wouldn't stop racing.
Missing you and wanting you once more.
Will you ever come back? Will I never again feel your light shining on my face and in my heart?
I sob and hold on for dear life to the last remnants of my dream.
You loved me there, I was safe there with you holding me.
Will this ever end?
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ReplyDeleteMan girl you are good. My heart aches when I read this.
ReplyDeleteOh sweetheart,
ReplyDeleteI'm going to skip the fact that this is extremely well-written and go right to it breaks my heart.
You know what? I don't think you want it back. I know it hurts, and you want that closeness, but not here. This is someone who doesn't understand the depth of your friendship and the value therein.
Disturbing, Heart wrenching, Emotional. Wow.
ReplyDeleteShawna said everything perfectly.
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ReplyDeleteShawna and Heather are right, this is very well written. *slaps wrist for not saying so before*
ReplyDeleteI feel I used a little too much humor for something so emotional. That was insensitive and I apologize.
ReplyDeleteWhat you wrote here was very beautiful, moving, and deep.
Crystal: DORKUS.. I love you but you are not allowed to delete comments! *hugs*
ReplyDeleteLOL, yes ma'am.
ReplyDeleteBut in my defense I thought it was insensitive. I was making amends. Um hello, you just posted about that. LOL
Girl, you're retarded if you don't think that we all love hearing about you and your day. You touch a lot of people every damn day and don't even know it. 'Nuff said.
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