And Still...

Photo credit: Blackman Whitelife

There is no air

For me to breathe

There is no light

To guide my way

The flowers don't bloom

My world is dark

Only my mind is bright

With pictures of you

That look in your eyes

Meant only for me

Chemistry binding

Skin mixed with sin

Soul and heart 

Spirits entwined

Until death do us part

But there was no death

Yet my broken heart 

Continues to beat

Even when there is no air

And still...

You manage to breathe

Your Grave

The man in the moon dances

Among shadowed graves

Guilty souls reach

From their supposed resting place

Harmonizing as one

Singing their stories

Climbing beyond the winds

A chorus of broken dreams

Regrets and half measures

Paltry attempts at love

Tales spun from tainted imaginings

Deceit speckled with loyalty

Do you recall their faces?

Can you evoke their names?

Once all is said and done

When your grave is dug

Will anyone recall your face?

Will anyone care to evoke your name?

I’m sure the souls will welcome your song

His Journey

The velvet night sky stretches wide

A lonely canvas painted by clouded memories
Love eagerly seeks a place
Away from the brewing storm
To rest his weary soul

A Heart sings a call above frigid winds
Beyond creation it waits
With limitless calm and patience
For Love to find his way
Back home

Thunder crashes
Lightning brightens the darkened sky
The Heart’s song penetrates the deafening rain
Its chorus woven and complete
Fueled with adoring passion and simple melody

Love hears the Heart’s call
Rising above the mutiny
He launches and soars beyond winds high
His delicate spirit touches and ignites the stars
Then winks at the moon as he travels by

He knows the Heart promises reprieve
Warmth and peace
The Heart swells and beats in anticipation
As finally Love settles before it

His journey is over
Love has found his place
The heart cradles him
Within its arms
Soothing Love’s tired soul

He sleeps

~~~

For Sterling
01/04/12

Rest easy now, my friend. You will be missed, always.

Jagged Shards

I remember
When it was fresh and new
We laughed within
Endless hours of conversation
And then sat quietly for hours more
Discovering each other’s masks
Our many different faces

Carefully carved lines
Marked the path we
Trespassed
Keeping us safe
Yet trapping us
Bestriding the bond
Over a cavern of sin

Connecting fantasies
Dreams and nightmares
Indulging in wants
We shouldn't have
Taking what we pleased
In spite of consequence
Damning sanity

Breathing deep
Every moment
Each touch
Fire raged between us
An uncontrollable heat
Singeing our lips
With each passing kiss

Such intense emotion
At times neglected
Leaving my heart raw
In a defenseless state
Blurring the lines
In the blink of an eye
Between love and hate

The result could only be
Heartache
Broken dreams
Sweet hours of conversation
Now silenced by misery
Riding our merry-go-round
We twirled

Sitting quietly became
A deliberate punishment
Yours or mine
Who’s to say
Amidst hurt feelings
And indifference
It’s all the same

Leaving me behind
In this broken state
All things sacred
Left in jagged shards
Crushed in justifiable
Yet uncalled for
Disdain

There is no glue
No way to repair
The broken mirror
Replicating me
A thousand different ways
There is no more pain
No blood left to bleed

The pretty mess
I willingly let you
Make of me
Do you see what I see?
Horrified by all
The memories
You stole from me

Can you still feel me?
Like you used to
Thoughts of you still haunt me
Do thoughts of me haunt you?
I suppose
It doesn’t really matter
If they do

Still
I remember
When it was fresh and new
We laughed within
Endless hours of conversation
And then sat quietly for hours more
Do you?

Words

Winds whisper your words to me
I love you
And repeat
A million different ways

Your many faces
Make no difference to me
Only memories
A movie reel on repeat
Showing what was
Playing what is
Projecting what will never be

Tainted pictures painted of me
The story told
Words written in angry disdain
Cause pain
Yet hold no weight
Only the million ways
I love you
Inevitably warmed me
Remains

The pain hides within my eyes
My smile
Nothing more than polite disguise
Unchangeable and ever beautiful
To everyone but you

Again the winds whisper
Devoid of your feelings
Feelings I shouldn’t want or need
Feelings that mean too much to me

Breathless

My breath escapes
Held captive
By your rhapsody
My soul lay bare
Beneath entrancing whispers
And translucent eyes
My heart open
To caress
My body yours
To possess
My response for any request
Will always be
A breathless
Yes
Come back to me
My body craves you
My ethereal love
Wrap your mind
Inside mine
Become real
And love me
One last time

We

My trickle of hope
Leans across the pillow
Beside me
Words fall from your eyes
Soundless pleas
Meaning everything
Soothing heartache and pain
Leaping into your soul
Dancing in memories
Of We
Twisting together
A Connection
Withstanding sin
Cradled in hands of gods
An undying love
Produces simple yearning
Revealing trepidation
Trust lost to one
Leaving requests unfulfilled
Fear rules and strips devotion
In two
Severing the bond
One still holds true
Tears trickle
Across the pillow
Hope flickers
Then gone

Blurred

Lines of certainty
Appear blurred
Stretched out among
Miles of unknown territory
Before my eyes
Nothing feels consistent
Self awareness
A distant memory
Distorted thoughts
Govern everything
Impairing judgment
I no longer trust
My own beliefs
Mindless moments
Crowded with insecurity
Who am I
Now that you’re gone
Who will I be

Willingly

Reality flickers brightly
On an unfamiliar road

Starbursts blossoming
Tears blur everything

Unsteady in my course
Unsure of my beginning

Open wounds
Still raw

One step forward
Two back

It seems
I’m forever trapped

Deeply yearning inside
Maybe for all time

I fell and cracked in pieces
Cluttering the ground before you

Shattering the window
I had always stared through

Seeking your soul
A vortex promising nothing

You let me go
Willingly

How I wish it had been
Regretfully

Does it matter to you that I’m gone?
It matters to me

The Merry-Go-Round

Memories of oblivion

Swirl within my soul

Another shot

One more hill

Soaring high

Another pill

Around the merry-go-round

I fly

I’m sorry

Don’t cry

I promise I’m fine

I just need to hide

Behind crumbling walls

Water trickles constantly

Carving crevices

Gaps between

Weathered and worn

Broken stones

Another shot

One more hill

Soaring high

Another pill

Down the slippery slope

I slide

Catch me

Don’t let go

Watch as I fly

Just one more time

Around the merry-go-round

I ride

Captured

Twisted threads of broken webs

Capture and bind

Pieces of my soul

Spun loosely around

My torn heart

Shattered memories

Carried away on winds

Whispering wishes

Heard though not fulfilled

Floating then falling

To an uncertain world

Yielding to defeat

Captured and bound

Within twisted webs

Contentment is found

Inside the pain

Sweet Memories

Visions of you

Hovering over me

A glimpse of past sensations

Run through my core

Beckoning me

Coaxing free lust

Concealed in shadows

Holding sweet memories

Gasping for air

Begging for more

Tempting

Teasing

Whispering

Do you miss the taste of me?

Boomerang

My thoughts

Colored

With memories of

You

My mind wanders

No longer

Mine

Your denial

Of this

Pain

Runs thick

Within my veins

This see-saw of

Emotions

Blurring everything

Desperate

My heart

A boomerang

You’re not aware

These choices bring

Pure insanity

You hear me

Yet you’re not listening

I can’t save you

You won’t let me

You’ve passed me by

My tears

Colored

With memories of

You and me